Hello! I hope you find solace
attending my funeral.
I’ve arranged
to have my hologram
deliver my eulogy.
Thank you for coming.
As you know,
I’m in a better place.
When I was alive I was loved
by everyone who knew me.
I was such a good person.
I radiated peace & love.
I took hundreds of LSD trips
in the 60’s & 70’s & many
dozens of psilocybin trips
in the 70’s & 80’s. I lost count
of the peyote/mescaline trips
taken in the 80’s & 90’s
& I injected MDA frequently
in the 90’s & 00’s.
I ventured into the Amazon
in the 10’s to take Ayahuasca
& in the 20’s
I began licking frogs.
Because I needed to be alive
to create this hologram,
I don’t know how I died.
From here on in
this is all conjecture.
The frog that killed me
was big as a Clydesdale.
I was riding on its back
without a suitable saddle
when the beast suddenly
grew wings & took flight.
The frog’s skin was too slick
to get a good grip.
Knowing me, I left my body
before it hit the ground.
Only this time I can’t return.
I was such a good person.
